Maybe it’s about time I start doing what I actually want to do. Until now, on weekends I kept thinking things like, “Maybe I should do something that connects to work,” or “If I have time to play games, there must be a more productive way to spend it.” But that’s not it. I need to spend more time on the things I actually like. I want to travel abroad. I want to join a tennis school. I want to make friends through hobbies I’ve never tried before. I want to play games. I want to build muscle and gain confidence. I want to become fluent in English. I want to do a workation somewhere in the countryside. I want to go to Uzbekistan. It might sound like some kind of reverse “high-motivation” mindset or whatever, but I have to be the main character in my own life. It’s not about trying weirdly hard. It would just be a waste if I didn’t do the things I actually want to do. Being scared to go after what I want doesn’t feel like me. I’ll meet more people, reconnect with old friends, and keep expanding my circle.

I went to a live concert by Vaundy. It was my first time going to this kind of large-scale concert held in a venue with tens of thousands of people. The lighting and stage production were just insanely cool. My energy went through the roof. The song that got me the most hyped was “Yobigoe.” Vaundy is only 25, but he gathers tens of thousands of people and has this much influence. That’s incredible. He’s so cool that it even makes me feel a bit jealous. That confidence — the way he stands there like he’s the main character — is cool. I want to imitate that. Not just in friendships either. I want more of that attitude like, “What I’m saying is right, right?” Like, I’m the main character here, so my opinion must be right. Alright then. Guess I’ll just start doing whatever I want!!!

Today I went outside for the first time in a while, took a walk, watched a local baseball game, and just sat there spacing out. While doing that, I found myself thinking about what it really means to be a “good person” or a “kind person.” It’s easy to describe someone with abstract words like good or kind. But if you truly want to convey what you feel about someone, it’s better if you can explain it more concretely. For me, a good or kind person is someone who tries to understand how others feel and has consideration for them. Someone who thinks, “This might hurt the other person, so I shouldn’t do it,” or “This must have been difficult for them to do for me, so I should properly express my gratitude.” I feel that people who try to understand the feelings of others are good and kind. When you are with someone who has that kind of attitude, if you care about them, they will also care about you in return. That mutual consideration gradually builds trust between both people. Whether it’s a friend, a best friend, a girlfriend, or a spouse, when someone tries to understand my feelings and cares about others, it naturally makes me want to do things for them too. That cycle creates a comfortable relationship. As long as I can see that the person genuinely cares about others, it’s okay if their actions sometimes miss the mark a little, or even if their behavior doesn’t always match their intentions. It’s difficult to consistently prove your feelings through actions all the time. Sometimes people are simply not in the right condition to do so. If you can tell from the overall relationship that the person has that caring attitude, your tolerance becomes much wider. And when my own condition isn’t good, I can rely on them as well. That too can become part of a positive cycle. For me, a good or kind person is someone who tries to understand the feelings of others and has a caring heart.

I went to a ski resort recently. Since I was born and raised—and still live—in a place where it never snows, being in a snowy environment feels very special and different. Going somewhere like that is so refreshing; I’m really glad I went. It had been several years since I last skied, but my body remembered how to do it, and I could ski reasonably well. It’s so mysterious. For instance, I probably couldn't solve the entrance exam math problems I studied years ago, but I can still ski because my body learned it. It made me realize that while knowledge fades, things you learn through your senses stay with you. Besides skiing, I ate delicious food, saw beautiful scenery, and met someone special to me. It turned into a wonderful memory. I'm so glad I went!

I recently celebrated my 25th birthday. Realizing I’ve entered my late 20s, I still feel young, yet I can’t shake this growing sense of urgency that I’m drifting away from "youth." I’ve decided that 25 will be the year I finally follow through on everything I’ve left half-finished. By the time I turn 26, I want to see clear, visible results in three specific areas: English, fitness, and flexibility. Take English, for example. I’ve always had the motivation to become a speaker. For years, I’ve dabbled—doing online lessons here and there, or brushing up on grammar every now and then. But it was always too sporadic. It never became a steady habit, and nothing ever stuck. If I keep going like this, I’ll just end up as an old man who "feels" like he studied but never actually learned to speak. This year, I’m going to push myself until I can actually hold a conversation. Fitness is the same story. I’ve always been insecure about being thin, so I’ve exercised on and off, but nothing has changed because I wasn't consistent. Flexibility, however, is an urgent matter. I injured my hip before, and ever since, my lack of flexibility and narrow range of motion have made me prone to pain. If I don't act now, I might even face hip replacement surgery in the future. I need to prioritize my hip flexibility immediately. Right now, I’m consistently taking online English lessons and hitting a personal gym. I’m going to keep this momentum, increase my frequency, and stay focused.